Experience is a brutal teacher. But you learn. My God, you learn. C.S. Lewis

For a while now I have been discouraged, distant, and isolated. I have seriously hurt myself, and along the way I have hurt those few people who still care about me. I have been on the ropes, I have been down and out, I have been lost and lonely. But now I am taking the first faltering steps to recovery, I am getting my life back on track. There are still things that frighten me, but I haven’t lost everything, and I am still alive, hopefully with no permanent damage to my body, mind, and spirit. To move forward from this brush with darkness I am taking responsibility for myself, reaching out and sharing my experience, what happened to me, and how I might manage to leave the last station on the road to Purgatory.

Jack Collier

“The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” ~ Thomas Edison

Hi, my name is Jack Collier. Not so long ago I was depressed, unfit, unhealthy, and at least a borderline alcoholic. My chances of having a social life were less than zero, I never saw anyone, after all I was usually too drunk to leave my garret. A short while ago I almost killed myself, and today I’m going for a CT scan to see just how much damage I’ve done to my head. This new blog will be about how I am turning my life around.

Jack Collier

it is the survival of the most selfish

Some say that jealousy is a character defect that has no place in a civilised society.  And that forgiveness is always the right thing to do.  All I know is that brutal Darwinism means that jealousy is hard-wired into us all.  Only the weak do not get jealous.

However, the jealousy of a man is very different from the jealousy of a woman, and that has been hard-wired into the psyche every mature man and woman since the dawn of time.  And it’s all down to genetics.

All living things have the desire to survive, but even stronger than that is the need to pass on their genes to the next generation.  This is the real reason we have the ultimate self-sacrifices of child-care, men dying for others, women dying for their children, religions, charities, altruism…..  Far beyond the drive for self-preservation is the ultimate need to ensure that your children survive and thrive.

Men are jealous because if their woman sleeps with another man she might be carrying a child with her lover’s genes, which benefits him not at all.

Women are jealous because whoever fathered her child, if her partner loves another women he may stop supporting her and her child, therefore her own genetic material may not survive.

It’s not about pride, nor loyalty, nor honesty, nor societal pressures ~ fidelity is about genetics.  Ultimately, women do not care who fathered their child, just that the child must survive and thrive.  However, men have no interest in supporting a woman who might be carrying the child of another man.  It’s a fundamental truth, cheating on your partner is the ultimate betrayal.

Things like birth control, morals, ethics, and religions have muddied the waters, but it comes down to the brutal Darwinian fact that, in a man / woman relationship, exclusivity is first and foremost an essential survival trait.  And it’s the survival of your genes that’s important, not your own survival, and certainly not your happiness.  Darwinism couldn’t really give a fuck if you are happy or not, that’s just a reward for making certain that your genetic material lives on.

That gives rise to a pair of conflicting rules;

1. If she has cheated on you leave her.
2. Whatever happens, make him stay with you, even if you’ve been cheating on him.

And good luck living by the hard rules of the survival of the fittest.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

women want a protector